Please. I'm not saying all these to you, dear. You should know. I will never hate or blame you for all these. I appreciated it. That you seem better and in less pain now. Glad. So, you are not the sinner.

I just hate it. I HAte myself even more for not accepting what they said to me when they meant for my own good. Even you. I hate it when you asked me to move on so many times when i don't want. . I just don't want to listen anymore. I won't talk anymore. I'll just write here. I shouldn't spoil their day. It pains to talk. You should know. I'll carry all the sins.

Just let me pain. You don't have to repeat so many times for my sake. I want to pain. I want to hold on. And i don't want to move on. So, it's not your fault. Don't ever think that i will scold you like that or talk like that here to you. You should be able to understand me well enough now. I don't even know how to get mad or angry with you although I want to hate you so much so that i can let go to make you feel better.

Whatever it is, I will pain for those who asked me to let go in the past. And when it has happened, i can't help but i'll make them the sinners.

I'm going crazy. JUSt let me be. Thanks and take care always :)